How to Use Affirmations to Transform Your Relationship With Money

Speaking your desires aloud holds real power. In my last post, we talked about a couple exercises that involved saying something aloud and recording the emotional sensations that came up. Now, let’s dive into the world of money affirmations. We’ll explore how they counter our internal self-talk, how they work best, and dealing with your own resistance.

Contradict Your Money Recordings

Affirmations are meant to contradict the money stories you’ve recorded in your brain. Often, your beliefs about money come from past adverse experiences, or people who told you discouraging things. For more ideas on how to dig into your past and discover the roots of your money recordings, read “How Your Relationship With Money Affects Your Finances (and What You Can Do About It)”.

Once you’ve identified the early sources of those money beliefs, you can use that information to pick the affirmations that will work best for you. The negative things you regularly tell yourself about money that you might have been dealing with from a young age are the areas you need to work on. Affirmations are excellent tools to use!

For example, let’s say when you were growing up, you were taught that money was the root of all evil. If you want to work on this area, you might choose an affirmation like “Money is a benign resource.” Choosing an affirmation that directly correlates to where you need healing will increase its transformative power.

 Transformative Words

Affirmations work by creating new positive stories about money . They help you rewire your brain and create new neural pathways. They also put your attention on money in a positive way, which can naturally lead to proactivity around your finances.

You will likely find this benefit of working with affirmations has a cumulative effect. You can experiment with this by working with an affirmation for 30 days. Choose one that’s specific to a money issue you’re dealing with. Write down exactly what your situation is like when beginning the experiment. At the end, write down again what the nature of the situation is now, and note the differences. Any changes that result are likely due to actions you’ve taken, even small ones, during the 30 days. The positive light that money affirmations shed on your finances can be enough to help you create transformative change.

Facing Resistance

You may notice that when you work with money affirmations, they activate your resistance. This is especially true if you’re using affirmations to contradict old money recordings. When this happens, it’s good to notice those feelings. What does that resistance bring to the surface? You can decide to delve into those feelings to see what healing needs to be done there, or you can stick with the affirmation a couple more times, just trying it out and letting yourself feel all the feelings that come up.

If you enjoyed this quick guide to affirmations, you might like to read my free e-Book, 9 Secrets to Financial Self Care, which provides you with nine more practices to help you incorporate financial self care into your work and life.

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Angela

Image by  Erriko Boccia 

How Your Relationship With Money Affects Your Finances (and What You Can Do About It)

Your relationship with money can make the difference between a steady stream of income and a trickle. How so? Because the way you relate to money, the beliefs you hold around it, etc. – these things affect how you pursue money and how you make decisions with it. Today, let’s dive deep into how your relationship with money affects your business and personal finances, and what you can do to improve that relationship.

How Do You Relate to Money?

If you want to get a quick pulse on your relationship with money, think about money or say “Money,” out loud to yourself, and then keep track of what emotions come up. More than likely, there will be several that come up in a quick succession: anxiety, avoidance, excitement, compulsion or repulsion, etc. The goal with this exercise is not to suppress or judge any of the feelings as good or bad. Simply take note of them as they come up. Try this several times to get a full emotional picture.

How You Relate to Money Affects Your Finances

If you’re anything like most of us, anger, shame, and elation may have made an appearance during that exercise. Other common visitors are anxiety, avoidance, and a vague feeling of worry. All of these emotions influence our behavior around money. They dictate whether we’re an over-spender or an over-saver, whether we’re bold with our investments or cautious. In our business and personal finances, if we feel strong repulsive emotions like shame and stress, we may avoid looking at our money all together. This can lead small business owners to live in a state of perpetual vagueness around their finances.

Many of the emotions we’ve examined are negative ones, but your relationship with money can also include positive emotions that can be leveraged. Elation, for example, can motivate you to take action and claim financial agency. Personally, when I think about money, one positive thing that comes up is the way that money gives me choices in life. Associating choice with money has long helped me maintain a positive relationship with my finances.

For many of us, the goal is to simply reduce the stress involved in our finances, so that we can begin to handle them from a more rational place. Acknowledging all the emotions housed in our relationship with money is the first step.

How to Improve Your Relationship With Money

Now that you have a good idea of your “emotional money picture,” and an understanding of how it effects your financial behavior, let’s talk about how you can start improving your relationship with money. This process involves looking at your life over the longterm, and examining what experiences and people shaped the way you feel about money today. There are a couple different ways to do this:

  • Journal prompts are a great way to dig into this and examine your past with money. To get things started, I suggest trying out the prompt “People with money are _____.” You can fill in the blank, and then write about the experiences or people who informed this opinion. Try not to edit yourself. Just observe the feelings and memories that come up. After you’re done, you might take some time to examine what you’ve written and see if you can find examples from your life that contradict those beliefs.
  • If you aren’t the journalling type, talk to a money buddy, confidant, or coach. Make sure this person will hold nonjudgemental space for you. Try doing the exercise above, or shape your conversation in such a way that you can really get in there and see the roots of your money beliefs.
  • Reflect on how your financial situation has changed over the years, and in recent times due to COVID-19. Sudden changes in financial circumstances can trigger new emotions around money, and bring up old ones. This interview I did with photographer Jennifer Graham makes a great example of how the pandemic has effected people financially in the short term, and what coping strategies can be employed around that.

A Note on Money Beliefs vs. Societal Circumstances

Before I wrap this up, I want to acknowledge the current state of our society and economy. While more aid for small businesses has recently been approved, we are living through an economically damaging pandemic. There are likely many systemic factors effecting your experience with and relationship to money, including race, social class, gender, etc. I believe it’s important to take this context into account when working on your relationship with money, while not letting it discourage you from claiming financial agency.

I hope this has been helpful. If you’d like to have these conversations with a nonjudgemental accountability partner, I offer as-needed personal financial coaching sessions, or 3 and 6 month business finance coaching engagements. I have guided many clients through the process of working on their money beliefs, and would love for you to set up a free Financial Self Care Consultation to find out if we could work together well, too!

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Angela

Image: Natalie Breeze

 

Book Review: The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist

This is the time of year when we focus on giving and gratitude. While I don’t believe either should really be relegated to one season, especially when it comes to our money, I do like taking this time to really think on these themes. I recently finished The Soul of Money: Transforming Your Relationship With Money and Life by Lynne Twist and found it the perfect resource to meditate on these ideas. Lynne Twist is a recognized global visionary who has worked with people of all income levels and is committed to ending poverty and hunger. Her thoughts in this book are a beautiful exploration of being intentional and in alignment with your money. Here are four takeaways I enjoyed from this book, that you might too! 

Scarcity vs. Sufficiency

One of the key tenets of this book is Lynne Twist’s definitions of sufficiency and scarcity mindsets. She posits that,

“Scarcity speaks in terms of never enough, emptiness, fear, mistrust, envy, greed, hoarding, competition, fragmentation, separateness, judgment, striving, entitlement, control, busy, survival, outer riches…Sufficiency speaks in terms of gratitude, fulfillment, love, trust, respect, contributing, faith, compassion, integration, wholeness, commitment, acceptance, partnership, responsibility, resilience, and inner riches.”

This quote offers some excellent perspective for self-examination. How frequently are we acting from a place of scarcity or sufficiency?

Lynne also discusses how the assumed scarcity that our monetary system and culture are both built on reinforces inequality of all kinds. She explains how when we accept scarcity, we also accept that some will not have enough, and that perhaps they don’t have enough because they are “less than.” She explains,

“When we believe that more is better, and equate having more with being more—more smart or more able—then people on the short end of that resource stick are assumed to be less smart, less able, even less valuable, as human beings. We feel we have permission to discount them. When we believe that’s just the way things are, then we assume a posture of helplessness. We believe that a problem is unsolvable. We accept that in our human family neither the resource-rich members nor the resource-poor members have enough money, enough food, or enough intelligence or resourcefulness to generate lasting solutions.”

Working from a place of sufficiency can help us transcend that place of helplessness and accepting inequality.

Sufficiency Opens Up Energy

The author also remarks on how, when we let go of scarcity and stop going after things we don’t really want or need, this “frees up oceans of energy to make a difference with what you have. When you make a difference with what you have, it expands.” She also remarks, “when people [a]re able to align their money with their deepest, most soulful interests and commitments, their relationship with money bec[omes] a place where profound and lasting transformation c[an] occur.” This reminds me of the concept I come back to often; knowing your money why. It’s so important to align your finances with that which is truly important and valuable to you!

Our Conversations Are Our Reality

If you look at the first quote I pulled about scarcity versus sufficiency, you’ll notice Lynne says “Scarcity speaks…”. In her book, she makes a point to discuss how our words and thoughts are connected, and work together to create the conditions we find ourselves in. Take a look at how sufficiency speaks. What if your conversations centered around gratitude and possibility? Surely sticking with that can have a positive effect. Imagine approaching your money with that attitude!

On the whole, this book is inspiring and eloquently written. Lynne Twist does a great job articulating a philosophy that I hold dear in my practice at At Peace With Money. She emphasizes how important it is to align with our true values, claim our power, and work to create transformation, for ourselves and others.

If you enjoyed this article, check out my other book recommendations! I’ve got a great collection of my faves that can help you explore your relationship with money.

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Angela

 

 

My Current Financial Goals!

So frequently, I talk about goals and planning and money systems here. But rarely do I share with you what’s going on behind the scenes for me. Today I want to give you all a look into my financial goals, and how systems work in my business.

System at Work

In my own business, I use a money mapping system that helps me allocate funds from my business for different purposes. If you haven’t read my full series on money mapping, I recommend doing so by clicking on the links above. My money mapping system helps me to allocate a portion of the income I make for saving up for my financial goals. I have a habit of over-saving, so it’s important for me to have a system in place that helps me navigate how much to spend and how much to save. If this sounds familiar to you too, check out my article on over-saving, and how overcoming it can help you! Making this discovery has definitely been helpful for me.

Goals: Big and Small

The goals that I’m currently leveraging my money system to save up for range from small things to big life events. Last November, I bought a 2016 Rav-4, so one of the goals I’m working on is paying off my car loan. I am also saving up to do a motorcycle tour of New Zealand! Originally I had a target date for this goal, but now things depend on when COVID-19 is no longer an issue, so things are a bit more flexible. You can read more about my motorcycling journey (and how being a small business owner helped me with that!) here. My last goal has less to do with saving and more with just practicing good financial hygiene. My husband is hoping to retire soon, so we’re keeping an eye on our spending to make sure we can live within our means when that happens!

Hopefully this post has given you a flavor for my goals, and helped you think about what yours might be too! For more help here, check out my article “Know Your Money Why.”

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Angela

 

Why Your Business’s Financials Might Not Be As Bad As You Think

Your numbers might not be as bad as you think. Many solopreneurs tend to avoid their numbers out of a feeling that if they really look at them, they’ll find financial troubles. While excusing yourself from looking at your numbers might put the problem on hold in the short term, that low-level stress and uncertainty doesn’t go away. In fact, it piles up into a sense of dread. I’m here to tell you that dread is needless. Here’s why:

No More Perpetual Vague-ness

Currently, I’m reading a book by Karen McCall called Financial Recovery. One of my favorite quotes so far is how she talks about the way people treat their finances, when she says “most people live in a state of perpetual vagueness.” Getting familiar with your numbers can actually be a comfort, because it can lift you out of this state of perpetual guesswork! Many people find that when they actually take the time to really assess where they’re at financially, it’s better than their previous emotional perception. So that’s why I say your numbers are better than you think – it’s likely true!

Take the Plunge: Look at Your Numbers

There are a number of ways to take this plunge. First, you can look through everything yourself. Especially if your books are not that complicated, or you have a rough system going already, taking a look on your own is a good idea. You can also get a good picture of whether you’re able to hire or consult with a bookkeeper. A good bookkeeper will be able to deliver a lot of important financial insights. This will certainly help you get out of that vague place. Even if your financials are indicating some unfortunate things, a good bookkeeper can soften this blow by helping you come up with strategies to surmount any difficulties.

If you were waiting for that extra push to really look at your business’s financial situation, here it is. And if you’d like to seek some assistance, with bookkeeping or profit strategy, feel free to book a curiosity call with me to see if that’s right for you!

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Angela

Image by bruce mars 

How to Find Good Financial Advice During COVID-19

Since the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic and its economic ripple effects, there’s been a lot of discussion and advice about what business owners should do. I’ve added my own voice to the mix, with a recent article and a full-length guide accompanied by a video series. Along with the variety of advice out there right now, there are also differing tones and points of view. Whether you’re looking to speak with others about money in the time of pandemic, or just hoping to find a way to navigate through all the guides, resources, and economic commentary, here are a couple things to pay attention to.

Nix the Shame and Guilt

Right now, I’m seeing a lot of people writing about this from a point of view that places a lot of shame and guilt on readers feeling unprepared and surprised by the economic fallout that’s occurred. Some are claiming that people’s lack of savings or inability to save for these types of emergencies is the ultimate source of their misfortune during this time. While saving up an emergency fund is of course a great idea, I do want to make sure that we recognize we are in the midst of a global emergency.

If you have lost money and don’t have enough saved to cover that loss, please don’t internalize that as your own fault. Sources that are encouraging you to do so or blaming those in need of unemployment benefits and other assistance are best avoided. If you are experiencing shame and guilt, take some time to process these feelings, but don’t make any decisions based on them. This might be a great time to do some mindset work.

Bye, Fear Tactics

While there’s certainly been an uptick in economic uncertainty, I’d advise you to steer clear of anyone leading a business pitch to you with this information. There are some coaches and other financial professionals who are currently using fear tactics to draw more clientele. Here’s a good litmus test to avoid people like this: don’t sign up for anything or listen to anyone who makes you feel more scared and activated than you were prior to hearing from them.

What We Really Need


Instead of fear tactics and guilt-tripping, we need to listen for messages that are factual. Resources that speak in practical terms and outline solutions are your best friend right now. Additionally, guides that approach the current economic situation from a growth mindset which stimulate your creativity and promote problem-solving, are good resources. If you have a public platform, keep all this in mind. People need guidance right now. The more we spread messages that are empowering and hopeful, the more we can contribute to the wellbeing of our communities.

If you’d like more thoughts about navigating all the financial advice out there, check out my articles on the topic:

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Angela

Image by: Fa Barboza

7 Financial Tips for Business Owners During COVID-19

Following the recent restrictions on gatherings, businesses that are allowed to be open, and all other health concerns and restrictions, your business may be caught in the wake of COVID-19. You are not alone. There are many business owners in similar positions to yours. While I don’t have a silver bullet for ending this pandemic (unfortunately) I do have a couple ideas of how you and your business can move through this turbulent time.

Be Proactive With Creditors and Landlords

For many people, rent and mortgage payments are due on the first of April, coming up in ten days. You may also have other bills, such as credit cards or debt payments coming up soon. If you are at all concerned about your ability to make these payments, I encourage you to get in touch with your creditors and/or landlords. Politely but firmly explain your situation to them and ask if you can work something out, like a reduced payment or a refined payment schedule. Because so many people are in a similar place, you may garner their sympathy and receive some assistance.

Cull Your Expenses

Now is the time to really go through your personal and business expenses with a fine-tooth comb. Cancel any subscriptions or memberships that aren’t vital. If you’re in California or Illinois, for example, then you’re probably not going to the gym or yoga studio anytime soon. Review your business’s spending needs and nix anything unnecessary or now irrelevant.

Get Creative With Your Services

Think about ways you can adapt your business to the current times. Maybe it’s time to ramp up your online store and start doing local delivery. Many yoga teachers and entertainers are starting to offer their services online. Brainstorm and get creative.

Check Available Resources

Every community has different resources available to those struggling with expenses due to COVID-19. Here in California, you can refer to the information provided by the Employment Development Department to see if you qualify for aid. Also check local nonprofits and other resources. Many communities are creating volunteer networks and community funds to protect the most vulnerable in the community. If you are seriously at risk, consider seeking these out. Otherwise, consider contributing to them, either monetarily or with volunteer time.

Lean On Your Money Team

This is a time when those on your money team can really come in handy. Reach out to your financial confidants, your bookkeeper, financial coach, etc. and start strategizing on how you can fortify your business during these tough times. Don’t make these decisions alone; remember that you have allies.

Mindset Matters

Although the virus is seriously threatening, those most at risk are the elderly and the immunocompromised. It’s important to remember that we are taking all of these measures in the name of collective care, to protect those of us who are most vulnerable. I encourage you to remember this and to avoid self-victimizing, panicking, or hoarding. Holding onto a mindset of courage and generosity will do wonders in this time, for your own mental health and everyone around you.

File Your Taxes On-Time!

You may have heard that the IRS has officially extended the deadline to pay taxes to July 15, 2020. While this is great news for business owners, it’s important to remember that you still need to file your taxes by April 15th. If you are unable to meet this deadline, you can request a six-month extension for filing. You can check out the IRS site for more info. EDIT: The deadline to file has also been extended!

I hope these ideas bring you some sense of hope and agency in unpredictable times.

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Angela

Your Prices Matter, Here’s Why

When it comes time for you to price your services or products, you might find yourself at a loss. There are all kinds of pricing formulas out there. Some involve complicated math and some that just ask you to consider wholesale versus retail pricing. My personal favorite way to determine prices is to set income goals informed by the purpose and the plan you have for the money you earn from your business.

This month, I’m going over some financial mistakes women I’ve talked with recently first made in their business, and how to correct them. Let’s dive in:

The Mistake

This woman I spoke with listed not pricing her services high enough as her biggest financial mistake. She priced them too low initially. After realizing this, she found it difficult to raise her rates, because her first clients expected her low prices. She struggled between raising her prices and earning a wage that was too low for her needs. 

The Solution

If you are just starting out and are about to price your products – congratulations! You can take preventative action to make sure this doesn’t happen to you. The most important thing to do first is to establish your money why – your purpose and plan for the money you earn though your business. Where will it go? What will it do? An important part of this process is looking through your expenses and determining how much your business will support you with them. Once you’ve established your money why, you’ll be able to set income goals based off this information, so that your income is truly able to cover your living expenses. Once you know how much money you need to make, it’s easy to figure out how high your prices need to be.

Ask yourself a few more questions: What products or services are you planning to produce and sell most often? How much time, labor, and supplies will go into production? Account for those costs in your pricing formula, and make sure the answers are what you want them to be. If you’re planning to make most of your money from custom embroidered portraits, but you actually hate embroidery, maybe you’ll want to tinker with your profit model a bit. After this inquiry, you’re well on your way to pricing yourself well. For more resources, check out this article I wrote about my interview with Megan Auman.

If you’ve already priced your products and wound up in a similar situation to the woman above, you can still double back and figure out your true income targets and prices. The real challenge comes in actually implementing a rate change. Before you do this, it can be helpful to do some mindset work. Raising your rates can be a scary prospect that brings up all kinds of emotional baggage, but if you work on it, you can get to a point where you feel settled. Then, go ahead and raise your prices! You deserve to be comfortable and make a living wage. After all, isn’t that why you went into business for yourself?

I hope you found this helpful! I’m doing a series on financial lessons learned from business in honor of Financial Planning month, so stay tuned. And if you enjoy these thoughts, I wrote a lot more about planning and financial lessons in this month’s newsletter. Read it here and subscribe if you wish – you can unsubscribe any time.

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Angela

Image Source: Jason Blackeye

Claim Your Power

Are we afraid of our own power? One of the things I absolutely love about Barbara Huson’s book, Secrets of Six Figure Women, is that it asks us to face this question. In a society where we are often trained to take lower pay and funneled into “helping” professions, our earning potentials are often restricted, and we participate in the repression of our own power unknowingly. Some would argue the drive to help and caretake is natural for us. Barbara pulls a quote from Fortune of Oct 2000 which reads, “Women feel powerful when they are making a difference and expanding their own capabilities.” Naturally, we gravitate towards improving the world, but we can do this while also pursuing personal power and security. 

Every time you leave the beaten path and aim for exceptional, every time you silence your fear and speak with your own voice, every time you stop acting small and start taking up space, you are owning your power and emancipating others to follow in your footsteps.

Financial Security Is Power

Power does not require money, and is not exclusive to it. However, if you have the financial freedom  to leave a job, leave a spouse, take time off, give money away, and allocate financial resources as you please, that can only add to your personal agency. Money gives you choices. Those choices can allow you to step into every part of your power.

When we claim our power in this way, we raise the stakes in our lives, and stop playing the small game.  Barbara writes,“It’s not what we have but what we do with what we have that gives us or denies us financial security.” Whatever we choose to do, we can do more easily and powerfully with financial security. 

Serious fear underlies female passivity around money. My post on wealth-building may have stirred up some of this fear for you – and it’s exactly why so many of us stall on our way to building our assets. This fear is understandable. We receive many negative messages about powerful or wealthy women. They are often the villains in animated films, and there are no positive words for powerful women. The ones that come to my mind are “bitch” and “ball breaker.” This desperately needs to change, and it starts with us as we choose to turn against it. 

Claiming your power and building financial security may be uncomfortable or cause conflict. It means rocking the boat, saying no, and not always being liked or welcomed. I believe that, in the long term, these things are a small price to pay in pursuit of your own freedom and power. 

Claim Power For Yourself and Others

Claiming our power is an act of self love. When we honor and value ourselves and have the bravery and financial security to live our desires – that is real self love. This love ripples outwards, and makes a positive difference in the lives of those around us. By striving for what we really deserve, we can inspire and pave the way for a new generation of people ready to do the same. When we have the resources to donate to causes we agree with, we can heal the planet and help others achieve their dreams. When we claim our power, we can also extend that power to others. 

I hope that this post inspires you to reach for your dreams – you truly deserve to have the financial security you need and the agency you want. If you’re interested in working with an accountability partner to help you get there, you know where to find me! Check out my Services page and schedule a call. This post is the fourth in a series I did on Secrets of Six Figure Women by Barbara Huson. You can read my other posts in the series on mindset, action, and wealth building at the links!

Angela

 

What’s Your Money Mindset?

If you got my newsletter this month, then you know that I’m deep-diving into Barbara Stanny’s Secrets of Six Figure Women: Surprising Strategies to up Your Earnings and Change Your Life. By doing this, I hope to lead us through a month of investigating our own earnings and making sure we’re earning what we deserve! This week’s post is about mindset, the first ingredient in that process.

Check In

Barbara interviews six-figure earners and contrasts them with women she dubs underearners.  One of the contrasts that is ever present between the two is a difference in mindset.  In her workshops with underearners, she uses a great exercise that I would encourage you to explore for yourself.  She asks them to complete this sentence:  People with money are _______________.  If this as well as the title of this book bring up negative emotions, you will need to change this story before you are able to change your relationship with your earning potential. 

I mentioned in my newsletter that I don’t believe that we all need to strive for a six figure income, or even that money is a measure of our success.  But as business owners, if we are not able to support ourselves through our work, we will find it impossible to continue sharing the gifts that we have to offer.  I believe that we need to shift to an abundance mindset. What do you think of when you think of the word abundance?  I feel that this word includes many things: being grateful for what we have now, for what the future holds for us, for the gifts and talents we are able to share, the connections that we have to other people and the money that our society uses as a measure of exchange.  Unless we include money in our desire for abundance, we will not be able to increase or even feel deserving of our earnings.

My Mindset

I have been exploring my own money mindset recently. While I thought I had a positive relationship with money, I still found that I had some blocks as well.  Because our society seems to measure a person’s value by their salary, it is easy to base your self-worth on your income.  In our household, my husband earns the money that we base our lifestyle on. When I truly began exploring my mindset, I found that I was seeing my earnings as “insignificant” in comparison to his.  When I began to separate the value that I deliver to my clients from my worthiness as an individual, my outlook on my potential impact also changed. 

The Deciding Factor

The path to making this mindset shift towards abundance includes gratitude, affirmations about your worth, and a decision to make a change.  Many of the six-figure women interviewed by Barbara started out with negative feelings around money, but they recognized that fact, made a decision to change and then put their new attitudes into practice.  The fact that you are reading this blog about money already shows your willingness to change. That is a great start!  

I hope you found these words about mindset helpful. Next time we will be talking about actions you can take to improve your earnings potential. If you want to talk more about mindset, I’m your gal. Check out my Services page and book a call!

Angela

Image Source:  Nathan Atkinson

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